Big City Girl...in a Small City

I just got back from Chicago on Saturday. I have been fortunate to have gone to Chicago twice in 6 weeks. I LOVE Chicago. I love that you can get wherever you need to go without a car. I love the idea of living in a big building…and seeing an amazing skyline everyday. I LOVED living in LA. I wish you could get around LA without a car…but that’s impossible. I have only spent 24 hours in NYC, and LOVED it. I really think I was meant to be a big city girl. I love everything about the Big Cities. BIG business…BIG buildings…lots to do…great shopping…lots of sounds…lots of activity. Great food…no…FABULOUS FOOD! Lots of opportunity to meet new people. Then I wonder what the heck I am doing in a small suburb of Nashville. And I do love it. I love the quietness…I love the genuineness of the people…I love the slow pace of life…I love how it’s family oriented…I love the COST OF LIVING. But I long for the big city. I don’t know why. Sometimes I think if I moved to a big city…I would miss the little city…actually I know I would. I think I’m worried that my window of opportunity is coming to a close to living in a big city…and maybe that’s what makes me long it even more. I know I don’t want to raise a family in a big city…I just want to be a big city girl for like a year or two. An even bigger dream would be to do it in Europe! But I know there’s NO WAY I’ll ever convince my husband of that. (Because I’ve already tried!) I love being married…it’s the best! I love my husband more than anything else on this earth…but I mourn being independent and selfish. I mourn that I can’t just go wherever I want whenever I want anymore. And I’m sure I could…but that would make me the kind of wife I DON’T want to be. I don’t know wherever all of this leaves me. Confused…and full of day dreams. I guess that’s not all that bad.